That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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