You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
