he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
