champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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