Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
