Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
