I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
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