Already got asked if we're dating
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
