Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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