Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
