Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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