The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
