He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
