Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
