It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
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