He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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