I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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