Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
