So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
