Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize