Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
