white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize