It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
