what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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