You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
