Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
