Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
