I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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