So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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