Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize
