i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
only if we run a train.
done.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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