How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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