I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
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