Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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