we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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