I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
