Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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