there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
