I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
