There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
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