also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize