so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
