He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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