It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
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