she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
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