I have demons in me.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Randomize