I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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