I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
