If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Randomize
