I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
