sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
