singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
